Ittsuji Shopping!

Hello Readers.

When I tried to sub the planned episode, I was getting the same problem I had with the "Matsumoto and Eri" episodes, where it thinks it's only an audio file when I try to split it. So, I went on to the next episode, but will return when I figure this out. So I got it done in a day, there's a small part or two with a sub gap, but I'll fill that in later.

On a PSA-type note, be sure to tell the people you love that you love them early and often. No one has passed away yet, but my grandfather's mental health is deteriorating. He's confused half the time and belligerent the other half. He took some joyride 4 hours away from home on his own and got stranded on the side of the road when he ran out of gas, and refused most of the help offered to him. Police had to bring him home (not under arrest, though, so one minor plus). It hurts to tell someone you've known your whole life that you love them, and they can't remember who you are. The only reason he probably thinks I'm related to him is because I look just like my uncle. In fact, he calls my by his name even though I'm 22, and his son would be in his 50's now. So, just as a small forewarning, if my posting here is late, sporadic, crappy, or just generally absent for a while, there's a reason. Probably family business to take care of.

Anyway, I'm just going to put the videos and after the jump.

Ah, the Gaki No Tsukai dressing room. The beginning for many a hilarious episode of Gaki No Tsukai. And with sitting in the dressing room comes... no, not dressing (oddly). . . it's insulting Yamazaki! Even better than the prospect nekkid or half-nekkid middle aged men! And in from the shadows of the corner of the screen comes none other than... Itsuji Itao! (Okay, if you couldn't guess who it is after reading the title of this post, you either don't know who Itao is or you're the person the short bus stopped by the blog for. I'll tell the driver to wait for you when school starts.) And with Itao is his usual entourage of his "wife" and "kid". These are the new wife and kids, and the Itao's first appearance back on the show after the "divorce" from his more popular wife. But this one looks pretty similar to the old one as far as body shape goes, but shows more facial expression. She seems to have slight comprehension of Japanese, if you talk slow. Anyway, they come in their Betty Boop printed wardrobe which has become a signature for Itao on the show. (He doesn't wear Betty Boop clothing on any of the other shows he appears on. Perhaps it's meant to be a trademark of the whole family as a whole? Wife doesn't appear on other shows except Gaki No Tsukai.)

This time, as per usual, there's an introduction of the new wife and kid, and then the unveiling of Itsuji's brilliant plan for making a quick buck. This time, he's invented an Internet shopping show called Ittsuji Shopping, and he wants to pitch it in hopes that SOMEONE (read as "anyone close-by with money") will buy it.


After the intro, Itao's all decked out in a nice suit *SLICK!* and he's ready to introduce the product of the hour! Today's product will be Erection King! The miracle product promises to cure erectile dysfunction and help save marriages.

In the spirit of infomercials and general love of innuendo on TV, there's tons of phallic objects and hip thrusting motions in the introduction, followed by the testimonials of "real" customers as well as a brief summary of the invention of Erection King.



After the first introduction of the product, Itao takes some quick prods at both Endou's fairly recent divorce from Chiaki by suggesting that maybe his love isn't enough but perhaps he could just bone her back into his life, and a quick jab at Matsumoto saying that he's probably impotent. LOL WRONG, ITAO. He may be a little too potent, or else he might not be getting this semi-shotgun marriage to his fiancee.

Then Itao brings out the sweat pants. These pants are just made of awesome and win and what dreams are made of. I want a pair. Someone make some. Now. He straps these huge phallic harnesses onto Matsumoto and Hamada, and then has them try on the sweatpants that feature a Wang Sleeve. He has them running around the studio feeling the man-centric design of the pants and then they are led through some light Jazzercise-style aerobics by Itao's Wife. (I don't think Itao can really get over the incredible dancing skill and success that his last "Wife" had dancing to 80's/90's tunes.) During this part, try to notice just how many times Yamazaki looks at Downtown's simulated junk and giggles to himself. You're married now, Yama-chan? Nice cover, but I'm not buying it.

After the Flop-a-Thon on Downtown's front ends, we watch another video about Erection King's other uses. This section features a fairly well-known comedian in Japan, who is part of a comedy team composed of himself (a foreigner) and a native Japanese. I'm pretty sure his name is Chad. I think. *note to self: research this later. It's on the tip of my tongue. He's always in cheesy Japanese commercials and short films where they need someone to overreact and speak a combination of Japanese and English* Anyway, let's just say, Erection King has many uses beyond a male stimulant.



Then, Itao moves onto the stereotypical "in-studio" explanation of how Erection King cleans everything and can ever cause time paradoxes. Then in stereotypical form of informercials, they play pretty much the same video that they already showed you two or three times during the allotted period and everyone goes "We've seen this already!" And then, it's time to unveil the items that you get when you purchase Erection King. You get a ton of Erection King in different forms as well as the sweatpants all for around 20 US dollars. *ponders calling*

And then they immediately sell out of all 30,000 available units. *slams down phone frustratedly* I just wanted the sweatpants. While Itao tries to convince Suga to purchase the rights to the show, I'm going to see. . . if I can get some of those pants.

I don't believe I've had this rated before, but I'd give it a 6/10 on my rating scale It's fun for the whole fami-- okay, it's fun for the grown folks and the incredibly immature. Things like this are why Gaki doesn't come on during primetime in Japan, and what's keeping it from coming on in most places overseas. That's truly sad.